It’s 1121PM. Evan is stretched out horizontally across the bed…starting with her head on my belly like a pillow;):).
This feels very reminiscent of the newborn days…”when the darkness comes”…as my sister Mal and I call it - the dread you feel as night falls and you know it’s unlikely to bring rest and you just…kinda lay there (very possibly crying quietly😬🫠), wishing for dawn to break - I would always just tell myself that if I could make it till 4AM…4AM was a reasonable time to crawl out of bed and start coffee:).
But here we are almost 9months in and still…no sleep.
(1244AM…less than 4 more hours🙂🙏🏻)
After months - j/k…it’s absolutely been years at this point - of sleeping in much less than 4hr chunks…my face is taking the brunt of my exhaustion…well, that and my attitude. I do so so…okay…until I can’t be okay with it anymore. Tonight is one of those nights.
Writing helps:).
My apologies for seemingly never feeling like writing when I’m in a positive and inspired mood…but I will say…though they sometimes begin from a ‘negative’ place…I hope you know I always find my way to a hopeful one:).
Since I’ve been on on an Instagram break for Lent, you might not have known that I attended my Great Uncles funeral in Iowa over the last few days. Myself, Evan (8months) and Mae (2-1/2years) rode with my parents all the way to Iowa (where the girls and I set up shop in a hotel…to not sleep for 48hrs;). It was honestly…wonderful.
Is it not the goal in life, to live 92 full, cognizant years, surrounded by the family you built?
I’m linking his obituary HERE if you happen to be wading through sleepless nights for any reason and care to read about the very full life of a pretty great man:).
Someone said to my mom recently: look at the legacy you’ve created!
May the years of sleepless nights be the hardest thing I ever face.
They’ll surely be worth the legacy I hope we’re creating.
RIP Uncle Duane🙏🏻❤️.
I meant to grab photos with and of the family but this is the only one I got…in the driveway when I was dropping them off after we got back home;)
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