Sunday, June 30, 2019

just a mom...who doesn't know how old her kids are.

post by Casey.

i've joined the ranks of 'those moms' that don't really know how old their kids are...let alone, their own age;). I'm embracing this time in our lives. 
"There they are...alive and an age:)." #BLESSED it's been a minute since we've blogged...and I'm okay with that. I'm about 5 years behind on my photo books...pretty okay with that. I've missed a few months of the Traditional-Monthly-Orange-Chair-Photos of the kids anddddd I'm letting that wash over me as well. I'm a creature of habit, who is convinced they're FREE AS A BIRD!!!;) So the traditions I've set for myself are hard to let go of sometimes. But I'm trying to remember that it's quite possible these photos books I STRESSED about completing will be fished out of a flooded basement at some point;).
I'm finding my balance between being so so okay with things as they are but also choosing wisely what I should put some energy into. 

the last time I blogged we were just days away from finding out we were expecting our 5th baby! Man. Here we are 6 months later and we are stuck between no longer expecting that baby and still not expecting a baby. The last 6 months have been a pretty wild ride. Of course, now that we're on the other side of it..I feel fucking...different. I don't want to be dramatic...and maybe that entire miscarriage deserves a post of it's own someday...but it was heavy enough to put things into perspective. I've always felt pretty happy and content and just overall...good:). But by the end of that miscarriage things shifted and I've never before embraced the not knowing like I'm doing now. 
We want another baby so badly. But god damn...we're happy:). "It's going to be okay.":)

okay...Jacob's got a To-Do List longer than most for our Sunday at I best wrap this up!!!
Here are the photos I DO have of our not-so-baby-babies:).

homer turned SEVEN in May!! He is still reading SO well. School has been great for him and he'll be heading into the 2nd Grade this Fall! He did Flag Football in the Spring - which he loved, has swim lessons in a few weeks and then a quick 3-hr Ninja Camp in late July! He's still a HUGE pain in my ass but his heart is so so good:).

theo turned FIVE in March!!! She's mostly disgusting and A LOT sweet but a total sass and we're working on just being nice to people in general. ARG!!;). She's still sucking her fingers and tooting all around the house. She loves horses and really nailed Preschool! Next up is Kindergarten in the Fall! She also just finished a little Gymnastics Camp and I'm so proud of how brave she was in going! She's also got swim lessons with Homer in a few weeks!

rockyP. rockkkkyyyyyyppppppppp. Luckily, I find him more cute than I find him frustrating because there's never a day or a time within every 1/2 hour that I'm not wondering: "WTFFFFFF ROCKKKKYYYYYPPPPP?!?!??!! WHYYYYYYYYY?????";). I've emailed several people about taking him off my hands for JUST 2 days a week and I'm having NO luck;). I love my crazy-boy so damn much!!!:)

ike has been sneaking around GROWING UP and of course I didn't realize this until I looked at these photos! GOOD LORD!!! Just in the last few months he decided to walk and jabber and become a Stage5 Clinger to mom! NO ONE BUT MOM WILL DO - he's even taken it a step further and decided to lose his shit if anyone even JOKES about taking mom away!!! Fun times;). Now that I've seen ALL of my other kids start favoring dad...I'm not taking for granted all the snuggles I'm getting because Mom will be discarded sooner or later;).
Ike still sucks his thumb. He sleeps like a champ. Eats like a bird. Loves the water. Hates anyone but Mom. Hates the sound of those hand dryers in bathrooms and tractors/machinery (they're currently redoing the road by our house - so that's been dumb;).
Ike are a huge turd and we love you:).
Also...that buzz cut!!!! I know that no one but us would agree but after buzzing it...we agreed that it just doesn't suit him. Currently, growing it wayyyyy back out:):).

Sunday, December 23, 2018

Ike Ewalt Turns (IS) ONE.

post by casey.

ike is ONE! 

can you believe it was 365+ days ago that we were waiting on Zika results and going in for multiple ultrasounds to check on his funky little kidney!? We're so happy Ike is here and we're so happy HE'S SO HAPPY:). 

besides being another wonderful pregnancy and a totally chill baby, this was one of my favorite postpartum experiences. Maybe being 35 helped me to feel more confident in what I wanted for Ike and for myself or maybe my friends being where they're at in life...but I knew what I needed and wanted to make recovery and my days better and those around me did the same!

ike is sleeping through the night. He's got 4 little hippo teeth (2 top and 2 bottom:). Ike is trying to stand up in the middle of the room - he's right on track to walk at about 16MO, just like his siblings:). He loves giving open mouth kisses and sometimes sneaking in some tongue;). He's eating non-stop - I think he was 22+lbs at his 1YR appointment:). Everyone loves Ike and Ike's cuddles:). Man, so lucky I've gotten 4 cuddlers!!!

i can't believe in a few days we'll be having our 2nd Christmas with a family of 6! Since Theo (our 2nd), each baby has just felt like a given. I knew when I had Theo that I wanted AT.LEAST four kiddos and here we are, already. I know I've said it in the past...but them growing older isn't really the part I struggle with. I sucks and it's hard but it's happening and although,'s such a gift. But the part that has me crying at night is the fact that I wanted this so bad...and here we are. And I didn't know that it would be as amazing as it is and I just wish it would have all taken it's time a little...maybe it's mostly hard to admit that when I don't know what the future holds...I'm in a fucking hurry to find out and then, wouldn't you know it, it all works out just as it should and then I'm kicking myself for not slowing my ass down;). 
Jacob and I just talked last night about how maybe none of it is supposed to make absolute sense until it's all over. BUT I do feel so at peace with where we're at right.this.second. Maybe it's a 4th kid thing or 'big' family thing or a lifeeee/age thing...but I do feel acutely aware that THESE.ARE.THE.DAYS. 

we're very happy and it's been a good year:).

Happy FIRST Birthday, IkeE. We're so lucky that we get to grow old with you!:)

+ if you've got 10MIN to spare - got a little carried away, I made a video of Ike's 1st Year:). Check that out below! +

birthday banner by PartyHappier

ike + coy's shared birthday:)

so apparently, a video of my family is one thing BUT put that shit in slo-mo and I will;).

Thank you for watching!!!

Monday, October 8, 2018

kids at various ages.

post by casey.

ike: 10 + 11 months and rockyp: 32, 33 + 34 months.

i think the last time I blogged about these boys, I put the wrong update? HERE I said I was posting Rocky at 32MO but really I didn't and SO here we are. 

HEY GUYYYYSSSSSSSS!!! Funny it comes...wait for it...Remember that time I said I was gonna have all this time to blog?!. The end.;)

anyone else feel like summer flew?!?!? Didn't even break open that Target Dollar Section Lemonade Stand sign. Oops. 
PS. I've thrown all SUMMER BUCKET LISTS out the window in this house. I give anyone that makes one and then doesn't end the summer in a complete fucking panic, a virtual high-five. I've got goals and hopes and dreams for our summers but that damn list has brought more rush and force and slight annoyance than I'm willing to allow in my life!;). Buuuuuuuyyyyyeeeee.

so here we are, 1/2 way through October and...I feel great! We've hit a great stride! Those few weeks leading up to the start of the school year have me super rage-ey and hitting WAY below the belt in all those fights I'm allowing my 6YR old to manipulatively drag me into. But we're better now;).

we've been busy selling all.the.things and Jacob has come home and commented on how amazing it feels to walk in to the living room and find things missing;). The weight of all our 'things' was weighing us down far more than we realized! And honestly, I think we have FAR less than the average household but so much. Minimizing has freed up space in the house AND in our heads and we're hanging onto that amazing feeling and continuing to downsize, downsize, downsize!!!

and less stuff means a lot less messes! The kids have only a few toys (still too many, in my opinion). Cleaning has been a breeze and so when I finish this blog post, the mess the kids make for me in the living room will be WAY less insane than it would have been a few weeks ago;).

okay, here are my old babies!:)

my precious baby boy is a week from his FIRST Birthday!!! I'm not even sad about it anymore. It's taken 4 kids to stop being so upset about the passing of the years. I mean...don't get me wrong, I'm still crying about it all.the.time. But today, right this minute...I'm okay.ish.

ike is pulling himself up next to things and looks to be following his older siblings in taking his time on the walking thing and I'm so down with that:). 
He's sleeping through the night. He's napping once a day. He's waving Bye. He's laughing and sometimes crying. And occasionally there's some head butting of the living room floor - soooo, it's clear he's mine;).

we stopped nursing a few weeks ago and that was both sad and natural. Like my last few babes, my body just slowed in producing and so we just gradually weaned and at times I wish we could just keep going and going and we could have had I tried to push it but 11+ months feels pretty great too. So there you have it:).

and then there's this...busy bee. Yeah...we'll stick to Busy Bee;). 

rockyp is trouble;). BUT I still find him SO freaking cute!!!! So after I get after him for coloring the tops of his feet in permanent marker while I make my bed, he comes and apologizes so cutely and of course I'm a sucker and believe him when he agrees to never do that again;).

it doesn't really seem like Rocky's been up to much?! He's less focused on learning to potty train and talking clearly and more concerned about taking a marker to my wall, shitting on my floor, spilling my coffee, dropping my computer, walking out in the rain with his socks on (and usually nothing else;), dropping a carton of eggs out of the fridge, tipping over my lamps, opening doors and not shutting them (and then me discovering this 30MIN later when I feel the cool breeze!!), calling 911, drinking straight out of my creamer, putting all my spoons under his pillow, knocking photos off the wall, ripping up Homer's homework, climbing ON the van, spraying me with the hose...while I'm reading a book...SHALL I GO ON!??!?!;).

jesus started creating Rockyp the minute he heard me, at 10years old, start saying to my parents: "I'm bored!". I see what you did there, Jesus;).

he gives me the biggest headache but honestly, I think he's created the softest part in my heart. I love this kid so damn much:).

me giving Rocky some 'direction' during our photo shoot - and in case you ever thought these were easy breezy;).

UP 16WKS in and 16MO out

DOWN 25WKS in and 25MO out (and clearly enthused about it;)